Whilst I’m writing up information for my new website, I thought I’d share a little with you… my views on birthing:

Pregnancy and giving birth to babies really is one of the most powerful things our bodies will ever go through. That said, it can also be the most rewarding and beautiful time.

Media, the medical world, unaware friends and family tend to scare a lot of new parents into believing that ‘labour’ has to be hard work, painful and not very pleasant. I can only tell you that it needn’t be if we stop fighting against our natural bodily instincts.

The reason why I believe this to be so, is through my own experiences. I am a mother of 4 daughters. My first baby’s birth was far from ideal, but with hindsight, it wasn’t as it was due to the fact that it was my first, it was lack of knowledge (and I mean a broad and holistic knowledge), fear and inadequate care that is quite often standard in today’s society where midwives are far stretched, not enough midwives per birthing mum’s, and not enough instinctive freedom due to modern rules and protocol.

My second birth was beautiful (I would have scoffed in disbelief if I’d have heard that before my first!) she was the most beautiful plump 9lb baby and I watched her slip out a happy little baby!

Then with my third baby I hoped for a home water birth, but baby number three turned out to be three and four… and as identical twins, the hospital protocol suggested a planned c-section at 37 weeks.

I gained some back ground knowledge, and used my

friends as support, and had a discussion about how I wanted everything to be as natural as possible. Fortunately I had a consultant obstetrician who was open-minded to ‘closing the rule book’ as long as the babies seemed ok.

And thankfully at 38 weeks my babies were born naturally 10 minutes apart. No surgery to recover from, and healthy babies that didn’t need to be taken to SCBU.

So what exactly made a difference between the difficult and not very nice first experience, and the other wonderful births? Well, I think there were quite a few things, but ultimately I learned to find the primate in me! We are designed to create babies, and this includes delivering. Back in the ‘olden days’ images show women birthing upright, letting gravity help them, they are mobile, and they are certainly not confined to the clinical surroundings of the hospital room, with a ticking clock… only allowing a certain length of time to give birth. Inductions were not synthetic, causing un-naturally strong and continuous contractions. Birthing women were supported by other experienced women, feeling safe and looked after. Now most ladies have the support of their husbands/partners, but most of these people are filled with fear themselves as it’s likely to be new to them too.

By having an experienced woman with you, you have someone else to support and enpower you to let go, and allow your muscles to do as they are supposed to – let go and release. Someone to support your partner through the fear he may be feeling. I did this for a friend between baby number two & three/four! She was attempting a VBA2C (a natural delivery after 2 emergency sections) and she was successful! So when I had my twins it made sense for me to have someone with me, other than my husband. Someone who had experience with birthing, and didn’t see it as ‘hard labour’. She was, in fact, the person who first introduced me to hypnosis. I tranced my way through many a cm dilation, and don’t have recollection of pain, only intense rushes that opened up the way for my babies to come out. I remember powerful sensations, but not damaging pain.

So, a better summary of what was different:

I was no longer scared after reading books such as Ina May Gaskin’s books reminding me that it was an instinctive natural process, and not a medical procedure.

Hypnosis to alter my way of thinking to positive and motivating patterns.

Trusting that my 5’2″ frame was built to grow and birth babies.

My trusted and nurturing woman to support me and the anxious husband!

Movement and keeping gravity on my side!
Although very basic information, I hope this helps some people! I will keep you informed as my doula training progresses, and as my hypnosis, EFT & NLP practice evolves further to thoroughly integrate  pregnancy and birthing as a focal point. As much as I love helping all different types of issues… I’m back to my passion area again, and it feels good!

Jay x